This goes out to the little girl who I nearly crashed into on the street and her mother.
I was going for my nightly jog, in a very light drizzle, and was just desperate not to feel alone and so unanchored and so unwanted. I had a really bad day, or rather a really bad week and as my soles made bold progress against the solid ground, I watched the trees move back behind me and the night stretch hopelessly ahead. With a sudden flash of light and a thunderous roar, the light drizzle turned into a downpour. I hastened and stupidly ran into a little girl wielding a pink umbrella. I quickly apologised and kept walking but her mother stopped me and asked if I was okay. I brushed it off, apologised again and said I was being stupid and should have been more careful. She asked if I needed money or a cab. I let her know that I was fine, just jogging, but before I could react, the little girl chucked the pink umbrella at me and ducked under her mother’s. They wished me a good evening before swiftly walking off.
I was planning to go an extra kilometre around the neighbourhood but instead I came straight home. Clutching onto the pink umbrella, the peace and love I felt were incredible and now I am sitting on my bathroom floor crying. I have not cried this much so long and it feels like something in me finally broke today. When we’re feeling extra broken and in despair, a little humanity and kindness go a long way.
When the night comes, look heavenward and be willing to see that the stars still shine; for the dawn will come.